It aint easy being brilliant...

The Golden State Warriors were the best NBA team in the state of California this season.

No doubt about it.

NOT the 16 time NBA Champion Los Angeles Lakers.

NOT the severely over hyped and in the end, extremely disappointing Los Angeles Clippers.

NOT the Sacramento Kings, a team that only a decade ago was a near lock for the Western Conference Finals.

But the Golden State Warriors, lead by 2nd year coach Mark Jackson.

A 25 year old Stephen Curry who is coming off of a breakout season that saw him set an all time single season record for 3 pointers made, 23 year old Klay Thompson, 20 year old Harrison Barnes, and a roster with only 2 players over the age of 30.

My point?

You have an incredibly bright future ahead of you, Warriors fans.

What a season.

You read that right.

Long time Laker, and 5 time NBA Champion Derek Fisher, who was last seen in Game 6 of last season’s NBA Finals as a member of the Oklahoma City Thunder, has agreed to sign on with the enemy in Dallas.

I have several reasons to hate this move.

First, because I fucking loathe Mark Cuban. He is a rich cry baby who keeps his mouth shut when things work out in his favor and joins Cavs’ owner Dan Gilbert as most likely to bitch and moan like the pretty little girl unfortunate enough to lose to Honey Boo Boo in a beauty pageant when things don’t go his way.

Second, as a 38 year old 5 time champion, why would Fish sign on to a team that is clearly nowhere near contending for a championship?

The truth is…Derek Fisher should be a Los Angeles Laker again. I get it, most of you so called Lakers’ fans turned your back on Fish when he got older, made fewer shots, and became less capable of keeping younger point guards from getting into the paint. But there is no way in hell that any of you can tell me with a straight face that the 38 year old Derek Fisher isn’t better than Darius Morris and Chris Duhon. Fish is still more than good enough to be a 3rd string point guard behind Steve Nash (if he ever comes back) and Steve Blake (if he ever comes back).

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You read that right.

Straight up. No draft picks, no other players.

The truth is…winning isn’t the most important thing to Dwight Howard. Getting attention is. Smiling after losses, showboating to the sidelines, all while we are losing and he isn’t putting up numbers is quickly getting old to me. And so is his attrocious free throw shooting that appears to be remarkably contagious.

But that is beside the point, really. What it really boils down to is the fact that Kevin Love is a motherfucking monster. A 6’10 power forward that is a 37% career 3 point shooter, an 82% free throw shooter, and is averaging 24 points and 16 rebounds a night a season after averaging 26 and 13? Where do I sign up?

If I were the Lakers I would trade Dwight for Kevin Love and move Pau Gasol to a young team with a young up and coming center that hustles and grabs rebounds (Anderson Varejao for example).

The problem with that, besides the fact that it would most likely never occur to my beloved Lakers is that Dwight Howard would never, EVER sign on long term in Minnesota, and you would have to think that they would want that assurance from him before making that deal.

But I can dream, can’t I?

I can assure you our team free throw percentage would increase substantially….

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I read a tweet last night that said that Pau Gasol was “just in a 2 year slump, but he would be back to his old self by the all-star break.”

Now, obviously I think that this is ridiculous or else I wouldn’t be writing about it, but I will not name this individual.

A “slump” is 5 games, 10 games, 15 games…2 years is a decline.

Pau Gasol is averaging 13.1 points, 9.1 rebounds, and is a 7 footer shooting an abysmal 42% from the floor.

What’s worse is that he seems to quickly be falling out of favor with new head coach Mike D’Antoni.

Did you guys see the way George Hill of the Pacers blew by Pau as if he were a 75 year old arthritic man in a wheel chair for a game winning layup last night?

I did, and it made me want to cry.

The truth is…Pau Gasol is softer than Drake’s “Take Care” album. It’s not “a 2 year slump,” it’s his current state of mind. Yes, he helped the Lakers win two titles, and myself and every Los Angeles Lakers fan all around the World will always be forever greatful for that. But the player that helped us to those 2 titles is seemingly gone forever and the Lakers passed on the legendary head coach that resided over Pau Gasol’s best years as an NBA player for a run and gun type of coach that doesn’t suit Gasol’s style in the least. Despite everything I just said, Pau remains our most tradeable commodity. Kobe is untouchable, the Lakers wouldn’t have traded for Dwight Howard if they didn’t intend to keep him, and Steve Nash is a 39 year old guard. No team is going to trade for him. If we are going to shake things up on the roster and bring in the kind of players that D’Antoni is accustomed to having on his offensively succesful teams, then Pau Gasol is the one that has to go.

Whatever aggressiveness that man had within him is LONG gone…

I don’t think I have to clarify this, but the “Baller of the Night” for November 12th is the 3 time former MVP on the recieving end of this alley-oop pass.

LeBron James, despite a mere 6 first half points, poured in 32 in the 2nd half to give King James 38 points, 10 rebounds, and 6 assists on the night in a 113-110 Miami Heat victory over the Houston Rockets.

Apparently Jerry Buss, the owner of my beloved Los Angeles Lakers, has a hard on for coaches named “Mike.”

I KNEW that Mike D’Antoni was going to be the man that the team I have adored since kindergarten was going to hire IF Phil Jackson didn’t want to return…

But I never, EVER expected them to chose Mike D’Antoni, a man with ZERO championship rings, who has never even been to a conference final, over the “Zen Master.”

My Lakers just chose a man that Knicks fans COULDN’T WAIT to get rid of a year and a half ago over a man who had won a record 11 NBA championships in only 20 years.

IF there was a coaching Mt. Rushmore, I can assure you all that the face of Phil Jackson would be front and center.

And yet my Lakers, an organization that Jackson had won 5 of his 11 titles for, said “thanks but no thanks.”

And I’m here to tell all of my fellow Lakers fans and everyone reading this post that Mike D’Antoni had best win in Los Angeles. Because fans in Staples Center were chanting “we want Phil” louder than I’ve ever heard any “MVP” chant for the likes of Kobe Bryant or Shaquille O’Neal, and louder than a few of the initial reactions to championship victories.

Mike D’Antoni will now ALWAYS be compared to Phil Jackson.

That isn’t his fault.

It’s not what he asked for.

But the fact of the matter is that, because of the way my beloved Lakers handled this situation, D’Antoni’s name will always be mentioned in the same sentence as that of the legendary “Zen Master.” And I hate to be the the bearer of bad news, but he will NEVER match up. No coach will.

So then WHY is Phil Jackson NOT the “new” coach of the Lakers then?

Lakers’ brass will TELL you that it’s because they thought that Mike D’Antoni was a “better fit” for our current roster. They will TELL you that it’s because they want to reunite D’Antoni with point guard Steve Nash to recreate what was ONCE a dynamic offensive combination with the Phoenix Suns.

But as much as it hurts me to say this….they are LYING.

No coach could ever be a “better fit” for a roster that they CONSTANTLY tell us was put together to win championships NOW than a man who has 11 of them. No matter what players are on the roster. And you don’t all of the sudden hire coaches to revamp an offense with aa almost 39 year old point guard.

So cut the crap, okay?

My beloved Lakers hired Mike D’Antoni because the $3-4 million a year they will be paying him is FAR less than the reported $10-15 million per season they were going to have to cough up for the services of Phil Jackson, because Phil reportedly wanted to take some road trips off, and because the “Zen Master” reportedly wanted control over basketball decisions.

Had Phil agreed to go on all road trips and not asked for authority to make personnel decisions, he would be on his way back to the Lakers’ sideline right as we speak.

Anyone that tells you any different doesn’t know what they are talking about.

Now to D’Antoni, and alleged superior ability to coach THIS Lakers’ roster….

Yes, we have Steve Nash, whom D’Antoni combined with in Phoenix for the league’s most exciting and dynamic offense, 2 Steve Nash MVP awards, a Mike D’Antoni Coach of the Year award, a 73% winning percentage, and ZERO championships.

But Nash, although still incredibly capable, IS nearly 39, and D’Antoni signed a 4 year deal, right? Nash is good for 2 of those at best!

But while he IS here, our offense will certainly be better.

Pick and pops for wide open jumpers with Pau Gasol, pick and rolls for several lob dunks a night to Dwight Howard, and Kobe Bryant will be an elite scorer no matter what offense or what situation he is placed in.

The 4 future hall of famers will be fine.

But what about the rest of the team?

My beloved Lakers do NOT have the shooters, the athletes, or the speed necessary to relentlessly run the way the Phoenix Suns did. Neither did the Knicks. THAT is why THEY failed under D’Antoni.

Metta World Peace said that D’Antoni’s system would mean “a lot of open threes.” And he is right. But MWP is far from a Ray Allen-esque 3 point marksman, and so is every other player on the Lakers, really. The player best suited to shoot the “open 3’s” will be the man who is constantly handling the ball, Steve Nash.

Most importantly, the defensive side of the ball.

This is what almost everyone is worried about under head coach Mike D’Antoni, and they have every reason in the world to be worried. NO Mike D’Antoni team has EVER played any defense.

BUT no Mike D’Antoni team ever had a 3 time Defensive Player of the Year in Dwight Howard, a former Defensive Player of the Year in Metta World Peace, or a 10 time NBA 1st team all defender in Kobe Bryant.

So I actually believe that because of them, our defense will be far better than most people think.

Our early season problems were due to turnovers, lack of chemistry in the no longer existent Princeton offense, and extreme lack of scoring depth.

I believe that new coach Mike D’Antoni will fix all of those problems, but he had BEST deliver a lot of wins and a championship, or Lakers fans such as myself will ALWAYS point at THIS hiring as a botched opportunity at championship success.

Okay…so the red white and blue headband that D12 rocked during the Lakers’ 103-90 victory over the Sacramento Kings, CLEARLY doesn’t match Laker purple and gold, and clearly doesn’t suit Dwight.

But it WAS Veteran’s Day, Dwight had 23 points and 18 rebounds, and the Lakers WON!

So as far as I’m concerned, D12 can rock that spangled head band during every Lakers’ game for the rest of the season.

This BALLER OF THE NIGHT award is for Dwight Howard, and this thank you to all of our veterans for putting their lives on the line so that you and I may have the freedoms we have is from 2brilliant2function.

Paul Pierce had 25 points and 9 rebounds in a 96-92 Celtics victory over the Milwaukee Bucks.

Kobe Bryant had 27 points, 9 rebounds, and 7 assists in a 101-77 Lakers victory over the Golden State Warriors.

The win was the Lakers’ 2nd victory of the season, and was accomplished under interim head coach Bernie Bickerstaff.

Coincidence?

I think not.

27 points, 9 rebounds, and 7 assists for Kobe Bryant.

14 points and 16 rebounds for Pau Gasol.

A MUCH needed 37 points from our bench.

And MOST importantly, our players were ACTUALLY smiling and having fun out there.

Real talk, the offense looked better and more relaxed tonight than it ever looked under Mike Brown.

And we had motherfucking Bernie Bickerstaff coaching…

The question is; how many games will Bickerstaff have to coach?

LAKERS WIN 101-77.

Too soon?

I’m not sorry…

Brian Shaw

THIS man should already be the head coach in Los Angeles. After Phil Jackson hung it up 2 seasons ago, we had the CLEAR replacement for him ALREADY on our staff. Shaw got along with the players, had played for the Lakers, had seasons in LA as an assistant under Phil Jackson, and the endorsement of Kobe Bryant. What else did the Lakers need?? We may never know…Brian Shaw is the man I wanted to coach the Lakers all along, he is the man most of Laker nation wanted all along, and if we can’t get one other guy, he should finally get the job he deserved all along this time around.

Jerry Sloan

What is ONE thing we all know for certain about Jerry Sloan? His players ALWAYS play hard for him. After an extremely long reign as the head coach of the Utah Jazz, one that WOULD have resulted in a couple of championships had he not coached during the Michael Jordan era, Sloan is reportedly interested in the job. If there is one thing you can say about the Lakers up to this point aside from the fact that the Princeton offense was clearly not working, it’s that we lacked toughness and discipline. Sloan would bring each of those the second he walked through the door. Sloan would be a great hire for the Lakers.

Mike D’Antoni

There is NO DOUBT in my mind that Mike D’Antoni would do great things with the Los Angeles Lakers offensively. With Steve Nash, who under D’Antoni in Phoenix won 2 MVP’s, Kobe Bryant who greatly respects D’Antoni, and Dwight Howard who would catch lob passses for DAYS under a D’Antoni/Nash ran offense. What concerns me is that Mike D’Antoni has never won anything of any substance anywhere he has ever been. His defensed have always been atrocious, and the Knicks, his last coaching stop, were often awful with him as coach. But D’Antoni never had players as capable on the defensive end as Dwight Howard and Kobe Bryant, either. Could he work? Maybe. Mike D’Antoni may very well be the SECOND man the Lakers call.

Phil Jackson

I saved the best for last. Isn’t this one obvious? Phil Jackson won 5 of his NBA record 11 championships as the head coach of the Los Angeles Lakers, and walked away from the game 2 seasons ago. Phil is the man I want, he’s the man all other Laker fans want, and even though Kobe Bryant may never say it publicly, you know he is the man the Mamba wants as well. Nobody knows Kobe better than Phil, we have Dwight Howard, who Phil could use along with Kobe much the same way he used Shaq and Kobe, to great success, and Steve Nash would be the greatest point guard Phil has ever coached. I know this isn’t going out on much of a limb, but with Phil Jackson at the helm, my beloved Lakers can win the title THIS season.

Let me end this post with the following statement….IF WE HIRE JEFF OR STAN VAN GUNDY, I WILL GO ON A 5 STATE KILLING SPREE!